Where Is My Mind ?

My head collapsed and there was nothing in it so I ask myself:
Where is my mind?

I know that it happens every time.
I know that as long as I have exams, it will keep on happening.
Still, it doesn't make it less scary.
At all.

See, I seem to suffer from stress induced post study amnesia.
One second, here I am, reciting -chanting even- what I just learned to Mr K.
I do my best parrot impersonation and make sure that I say word what is written on my sheet.
Sheet of paper after sheet of paper, I go through what I have to study for my upcoming exam and I get more pumped with each one that I recite correctly.

Then comes the night before my exam.
All of a sudden, I couldn't say what I studied for the life of me and I then proceed to impersonate a fish instead of a parrot.
Blub blub blub.

The -veeeery tiny- rational part of my brain knows that all my working has paid off and that it is actually stored somewhere in the back of my head but that rational part doesn't talk quite as loud as the other part.
That's when my fish impersonation turns into a headless chicken one.
Not a good look.

Tomorrow, hopefully, I will get out of that exam room and admit to Mr K. that yes, again, he was right and I remembered my shit.
Hell, so far I haven't gotten out of an exam in tears, wailing that I had indeed forgotten everything.

The mere thought of it happening, the mere vision of me giving black a blank copy will probably always ensure that I work myself into a frenzy the night before any exam.

Oh well.
As long as the only thing that I OD on to calm my nerves is pasta, I should be fine.

x, K.

(btw, I'm not an idiot.I know that the original song is from The Pixies which I also happen to love but the 13 year old inside me will always love any song sung by Brian Molko better )

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